BASICALLY BRIAN- A Weekly Column By Basically Brian

Hello and welcome once again, I’m BASICALLY BRIAN and this is my weekly dose of words, wonder, and a tale of years gone by. Before I get started I have a bone to pick with all of you, last week I asked you; how does the man who drives the snowplough get to work in the morning? Despite my pleas I received no replies, once again there is a prize for this and all answers are greatly received at greenday_basketcase@hotmail.com.

BASICALLY BRIAN’S Word of the Week

GYNOTIKOLOBOMASSOPHILE: This is naturally enough some one with gynotikolobomassophilia, which is, a fetish or immense desire to nibble on women’s earlobes.

The purpose of BASICALLY BRIAN’S word of the week is to broaden your vocabulary, and so you should of course use every word BASICALLY BRIAN teaches you at least once a week. As a piece of help this weeks word gynotikolobomassophile is pronounced as follows:

Guy-no-tea-co-low-bow-mass-o-file

BASICALLY BRIAN’S Question of the Week

How do octopi mate? (Octopi= the plural of octopus)

Please answer, greenday_basketcase@hotmail.com: for a bit of a clue, I believe it was Aristotle who actually figured it out.


BASICALLY BRIAN’S Historical Tit Bit of the Week

One of the reasons behind the French revolution was that there were those among the French people who believed there esteemed king Louis XVI wasn’t the manliest of folks. The reasoning behind this was that his marriage to Marie Antoinette wasn’t consummated for over three years! In fairness to the guy it was due to a medical condition he suffered from called phymosis. It would appear to be kind of like a Brittney Justin have they / haven’t they sort of thing but I have no idea how people would come to know about the sexual relationship of the royal family. During this time of probable frustration for our poor Marie, it was assumed that she must have had to play away from home; allegations were rife about misdemeanours with her servants, maids, and female friends, not to mention her children!!! None of these were true but it still increased suspicion of the family and didn’t help diffuse the tensions.